Interview with my pet bird? - By Skye
Skye: So, what’s life like being a bird?
Bird: Tweet!
Skye: I’m sorry, I can’t understand you! Let me get my bird translator…
Bird: Chat chat!
Skye: There we go! Say something.
Bird: Is it working?
Skye: Yes! Ok, that’s good.
Bird: So, what are we doing?
Skye: Well, I’m going to interview you. Basically, I ask a couple questions and you answer. Then, you ask me questions and I answer. Ready?
Bird: As I’ll ever be!
Skye: Ok, question one. What foods do you like? Why do you like them?
Bird: That’s not one question, that’s two!
Skye: Ok, ok, fine! What foods do you like?
Bird: I like a lot of foods, actually. Do you want me to list them all out?
Skye: Yeah, that’s the goal of this interview! Mostly.
Bird: Mostly?
Skye: Just answer the question! List all of them out, please!
Bird: Well, my favorite foods are the seeds you give me every day, the seeds you give me on special occasions, ---
Skye: Millet.
Bird: Why did you just interrupt me and randomly say “Millet”?
Skye: Millet is the type of seeds that I give you on special occasions.
Bird: Thanks! As I was saying, I like the seeds that you give me every day, millet, scrambled eggs, broth, peas, lettuce, oats, and those little squiggly noodles.
Skye: Hmm! Those are interesting choices. Ok, question two. Why do you like those foods?
Bird: They are delicious, duh! If they weren’t delicious, why would I like them?
Skye: Fair point.
Bird: So, what’s the next question? Or is it my turn to ask you one?
Skye: I think it’s still my turn. What does it feel like to fly?
Bird: It feels like flying.
Skye: That’s not very descriptive.
Bird: What does it feel like to have to walk around everywhere and not be able to fly?
Skye: I mean, it feels pretty normal.
Bird: Same with me and flying!
Skye: I guess trying to compare you to me is like trying to compare apples and oranges.
Bird: Except comparing apples and oranges is easy. Apples are way better.
Skye: I like them both equally!
Bird: Well, I don’t.
Skye: Why not?
Bird: You never give me any oranges! How can I like or dislike something I haven’t even tried?
Skye: Fair point.
Bird: Can I ask you some questions now? So far it’s just been you talking and talking and talking.
Skye: Sure! What questions do you have?
Bird: Um… um…
Skye: What?
Bird: I don’t know.
Skye: That’s a statement, not a question.
Bird: I know!
Skye: Ooh! What?
Bird: Can you give me some food? I’m hungry.
Skye: *groan* I guess so. You’ll need to go back in your cage, though.
Bird: I’ll do anything for food.
Skye (whispering): You can say that again…
Skye (normal volume): Well, in you go.
Bird: Yay!
Skye: That interview was fun! Let’s do that again sometime soon.
Bird: Let’s!
The End