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Interview with my pet bird?

Interview with my pet bird? - By Skye

Skye: So, what’s life like being a bird?

Bird: Tweet!

Skye: I’m sorry, I can’t understand you! Let me get my bird translator…

Bird: Chat chat!

Skye: There we go! Say something.

Bird: Is it working?

Skye: Yes! Ok, that’s good.

Bird: So, what are we doing?

Skye: Well, I’m going to interview you. Basically, I ask a couple questions and you answer. Then, you ask me questions and I answer. Ready?

Bird: As I’ll ever be!

Skye: Ok, question one. What foods do you like? Why do you like them?

Bird: That’s not one question, that’s two!

Skye: Ok, ok, fine! What foods do you like?

Bird: I like a lot of foods, actually. Do you want me to list them all out?

Skye: Yeah, that’s the goal of this interview! Mostly.

Bird: Mostly?

Skye: Just answer the question! List all of them out, please!

Bird: Well, my favorite foods are the seeds you give me every day, the seeds you give me on special occasions, ---

Skye: Millet.

Bird: Why did you just interrupt me and randomly say “Millet”?

Skye: Millet is the type of seeds that I give you on special occasions.

Bird: Thanks! As I was saying, I like the seeds that you give me every day, millet, scrambled eggs, broth, peas, lettuce, oats, and those little squiggly noodles.

Skye: Hmm! Those are interesting choices. Ok, question two. Why do you like those foods?

Bird: They are delicious, duh! If they weren’t delicious, why would I like them?

Skye: Fair point.

Bird: So, what’s the next question? Or is it my turn to ask you one?

Skye: I think it’s still my turn. What does it feel like to fly?

Bird: It feels like flying.

Skye: That’s not very descriptive.

Bird: What does it feel like to have to walk around everywhere and not be able to fly?

Skye: I mean, it feels pretty normal.

Bird: Same with me and flying!

Skye: I guess trying to compare you to me is like trying to compare apples and oranges.

Bird: Except comparing apples and oranges is easy. Apples are way better.

Skye: I like them both equally!

Bird: Well, I don’t.

Skye: Why not?

Bird: You never give me any oranges! How can I like or dislike something I haven’t even tried?

Skye: Fair point.

Bird: Can I ask you some questions now? So far it’s just been you talking and talking and talking.

Skye: Sure! What questions do you have?

Bird: Um… um…

Skye: What?

Bird: I don’t know.

Skye: That’s a statement, not a question.

Bird: I know!

Skye: Ooh! What?

Bird: Can you give me some food? I’m hungry.

Skye: *groan* I guess so. You’ll need to go back in your cage, though.

Bird: I’ll do anything for food.

Skye (whispering): You can say that again…

Skye (normal volume): Well, in you go.

Bird: Yay!

Skye: That interview was fun! Let’s do that again sometime soon.

Bird: Let’s!

The End

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